Today we said goodbye to my grandma. A memorial day of beautiful, bittter-sweet moments. And somehow I feel the need to pen a few thoughts before the sun sets on this sacred day.
I’m fighting to hear her voice again, her laughter ring in my ears. Suddenly this memory surfaces and I can hear her sing with all gusto ..
.”…Rrr—iggedy jig and away we go, away we go, away we go, riggedy jig and away we go hi -ho, hi -ho,hi -ho.”
I’m 5 again, her soft hand holding mine and my little brother’s on her right. We’re skipping up the hill by her house off on another grand adventure. Her little poodle, Tuffy tags along and discovers a butterfly on the sidewalk’s edge. Grandma stops us abruptly… ” Look!!” She exclaims with a twinkle in her eye- “Isn’t that just won-der-ful!” she claps her hands with delight. “Our God is SO good to show us that!!” And then the song resumes and we skip off again into a world full of possibilities.
You see, this. THIS is how she saw life. Each day, a gift from Her creator and one step closer to Heaven. Her eyes were trained to see the beauty all around and she’d often invite others to share in her joy.
I remember the house she and grandpa lived in and how excited we’d be to knock on that thick brown glass door and ring her cathedral chime doorbell.
I remember the front room, and how perfectly clean it was, doilies covering every table top surface. To a little girl it appeared to be a mansion!!! I remember the honkey- tonk piano and organ and how I learned my first piano pieces there by her side.
I remember the glass jars of peach rings, Werther’s originals, and Hershey chocolate nugget gold bars. (She’d always encourage us to sneak a few even in our grown up years). I remember their den where she sat me on her lap and taught me to sew and the stories she’d tell tell while we did. She could captivate any audience with her stories, but children especially. I remember the smell of her lavender soap when we took baths there on overnight stays.
I remember childhood mornings or later in college when I often crashed there for the night. One thing never changed…the morning routine: the smell of coffee brewing, a hot bowl of oatmeal decorated with brown sugar and raisins, and sweet rolls on dainty glass plates at the table in the enclosed patio room. Grandma and Grandpa would begin every day (rain or shine, camping or home, healthy or sick) by cracking open the weathered blue Bible and reading a portion of scripture, then praying for each family member by name.
And then grandma would get up and fill the three bird feeders outside the window with a koolaid- red liquid. We’d watch with anticipation to notice which birds might come to visit THAT day. Hummingbirds were her absolute favorite.
And she’d marvel at how God made such tiny creatures who could fly so fast. “Only He could design something like that. …and just imagine, if He could provide for the sparrows how much more will He take care of us??” She’d say.
She loved the Lord and His Word. One year, while taking care of my grandpa with Alzheimer’s, things were getting especially rough. Grandma had cared for him tirelessly. She explained how Psalm 91 was her anchor. And she told us any grandchild who memorized the chapter would get $10. We followed bait, line and sinker -dollar signs in our eyes.. “He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High God, will rest in the shadow of the Almighty....” What Grandma knew was that $10 was a tiny investment compared to the deposit it made in our personal journeys with God. For each of us, we’ve clung to those memorized truths in our toughest days.
We loved doing life with her. Each of the grandkids (and even our spouses) have a chapter we can point back to of weekly meals/Bible studies/scrabble games with Grandma. And we treasure those memories. She was just the type of lady people wanted to be around. Her joy and laughter, contagious.
In recent years my little family would accompany my dad and visit her at the retirement home where she lived. Though dementia was sneaking its way in, she had these great moments of wit and humor. We’d sing and laugh together. She’d marvel at the kids’ voices saying “beau-ti-ful !!” and maybe encourage them to take a ride on her motorized scooter or “for Pete’s sake” at least have “nut and chew” See’s candy. We’d all leave encouraged and happy. That’s the affect she had on people.
Then one Tuesday morning in February, just after her 92nd birthday, she woke with a stomach ache and was surprisingly gone within the hour.
As the doors to the hospital were being thrown open..the gates of heaven were doing the same. Heaven gained a saint.
Days later, I helped my dad clean out her room, and a lady named Martha stopped by. With tears in her eyes she said, “I’m the housekeeper. Every Monday I’m here cleaning but I save your grandma’s room for last. She’s always here watching TBN and after my shift I sit for a spell and we sing hymns together and then we pray. There’s a lot of darkness in this world but she, she was a light of Jesus.”
I sat on grandma’s bed with Martha that day and cried big, fat, ugly tears because it wasn’t just US who knew the wonder of our grandma..it was everyone who came in contact with her. And even in her last days, when her mind was foggy and dementia set in….her foundation stood firm. She delighted in God and loved His people.
So tonight as the casket has been lowered, the ceremonies concluded, and the sun sets on the hills, I imagine Grandma looking down from heaven with that twinkle in her eye saying (like she did at the end of every phone call) “goodbye dearie.”
And I imagine her skipping off into heaven singing: “riggedy jig and away we go…hi -ho, hi -ho, hi- ho..”
Goodbye Grandma. We will miss you.
-Alyssa
And it rattles me.
